This is an extremely complex time in which to develop and nurture personal
godliness. That does not imply that it was ever easy to be godly. However, some
sets of circumstances make it more convenient to be godly than do other
circumstances. In a time of enormous personal opposition to godliness and a time
of enormous convenience for self-indulgence/physical exploitation, people
(including Christians!) need a lot of encouragement and little rejection.
Christians have enough enemies without having to fear their own brothers and
sisters.
If you doubt the above assessment of difficulty in a commitment to personal
godliness, consider an actual person and event. A few years ago I was preparing
to direct an interactive session on recovery. These sessions did not focus on a
specific form of recovery, but on attitudes that must exist regardless of the
kind of recovery sought.
A person who actively assisted in the sessions came to me to tell me another
person we hoped would come was outside the building, crying, and would not
enter. After she was encouraged to come in and talk, she said, “I could not
force myself to come in. In my past experiences, I have learned churches are
places you go to get hurt.”
What a horrible image of those in Christ! What a horrible personal experience!
If a person should know anything about Christians, that person should know
Christians are helpful people who encourage because they seek to represent a
helpful God Who encourages.
Elders need to guide a congregation into a clear understanding of who they are
and what their mission is. Before you answer reflexively that Christians exist
as congregations to evangelize (in our typical concept of evangelism), read Acts
3:1-10. The same Peter who was the spokesman in Acts 2:22-36 went with John to
the Jewish temple to pray. The text gives no reason to think that their mission
was not prayer, nor that the miracle Peter performed was not spontaneous.
Peter used the event to declare what God had done in Jesus Christ (Acts 3:13).
God’s movement which began in Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob reached completion in
Jesus’ resurrection. The objective was to produce faith in Jesus (verse 16) and
repentance (verses 19, 26) in that Jewish audience.
Also read Acts 5:12-16. People from the entire region were bringing the sick and
demon-possessed and placing these people in Jerusalem’s streets, hoping that
Peter’s shadow would fall on them. Why? So the sick and demon-possessed would be
healed. The objective was to do good to people who needed the good.
This certainly fits with Peter’s statement to Cornelius and the group Cornelius
assembled in Acts 10:38. In Peter’s description of Jesus, he declared that
Cornelius knew Jesus was a man who went about doing good. Those who belong to
Jesus Christ go about doing good. It is the good they do that attracts to the
Savior they represent.
Recognition # 1: We are all in this together.
There needs to be a common understanding that a godly congregation and a godly
eldership are NOT by nature in opposition. There must be an overriding sense,
even when there is disagreement, that people in Christ have the same primary
objective. There may be disagreement concerning the route to take in Jesus
Christ to “magnifying/praising God” (Acts 2:24, 33, 36; 3:8, 13, 18; 4:10, 19,
20, 24, 31; 5:4; 6:2; 8:21; 10:34, 38, 40, 41, 42, 46; 11:17, 18; 17:22-31 with
John 3:16; 3:34; 5:19, 30; 6:38; 8:28; 12:49, 50; 13:20; 14:10; 21:19). However,
there must never be doubt that Christians exist as congregations to magnify and
praise God for what God did and does for us in Jesus Christ.
All in the congregation are included—new convert and spiritually mature, young
and old, men and women, the culturally different, and followers and leaders! We
exist to praise God Who created and Who recreates in Jesus Christ! Never must
our primary reason for existing as congregations be lost in our disagreements!
We always must remember that how we handle our disagreements and problems
greatly will impact our influence for God in our community.
Recognition # 2: Appointed leaders have spouses and
children, too!
Two standard criteria in appointing a person to leadership in a congregation are
(a) stability in marriage and (b) stability in being a parent. Stated simply, a
man who has multiple marriages and who is a questionable parent will not be
considered for appointed leadership in a congregation (1 Timothy 3:4, 5; Titus
1:6). Stated in an opposite way, men who are appointed as congregational leaders
are successful in marriage and are successful parents.
It should make no sense to anyone in a congregation to take a man who is
successful in marriage and as a parent, appoint him to leadership, and then
stress his marriage and his relationships with his children to the point of
failure. Sometimes Christian wives are not able to support their husbands as
congregational leaders because the congregation is so thoughtless and
unreasonable in its expectations. It is deeply troubling to a wife who has been
in a successful Christian marriage to see it becoming impossible for her husband
to be a godly husband while meeting the congregation’s leadership demands.
Sometimes his children feel cheated because he has no time to be with them. The
choice never should be between congregational leadership and godliness in
marriage and parenting!
Leading in a congregation should be reasonable in expectation and include times
of joy. It should not be a burnout experience that turns a man against his
congregation. Congregations should work with their appointed leaders to make
leading a rewarding experience. Both leaders and congregations need to work
together to make expectations of leaders “doable.”
Recognition # 3: Elders and congregations need to
realize the complexity of leading a congregation.
Among the most common complaints regarding appointed congregational leaders is
“slowness” in making decisions. Decision making by congregational leaders rarely
can be a rapid process for a number of reasons:
Recognition # 4: Elders need to consider an important
reality in making decisions.
These thoughts likely should be a part of the # 3 recognition. They are is
presented as # 4 because of their importance. The insights are the result of
years of personal observation in all types of group decisions, definitely
including the decisions of appointed congregational leaders.
Most decisions involve these stages for each person directly involved in making
the decision: