At certain moments, we all attempt to play God. We do not consciously try to play God. But we do. At the moment we are certain that we know what God thinks. We are equally certain that we know what God would do. We definitely know the direction God would take, the action God would initiate, God's immediate priority, and the specific results God wants "us all" to achieve.

Confession: when I experience such moments, my confidence, convictions, desires, and perspectives begin with me. Certainly, at those moments, I would emotionally deny this self indictment. "I am so focused on Christ, so 'into' the Bible, and so committed to God's will, I am certain that I am God's appointed spokesman." Of course, later, with embarrassment, I realize that I appointed myself.

The truly humbling moments of life occur when I get a glimpse of me as God sees me. A reading from the Bible, a biblical insight, an awareness from a real life situation, or reflection on God's incomprehensible being provides that glimpse. Such moments are too rare, too infrequent. But they are life's most useful moments--intensely spiritual and blessing filled. What prayers those moments produce!

The God who created everything seeks to direct me who created nothing. The God who forgives anything seeks to guide me who struggles to forgive. The God who loves the ugliest, evil torn, ungodliest person seeks to focus me who thinks it an accomplishment to love the lovable. If I were God, I don't think I would like me. I am ignorant, weak, flawed, mistake prone, arrogant, conceited, evil afflicted, and easily tempted. My heart and my mind are a mess. The only righteousness that I can honestly claim as my accomplishment is self-righteousness. Were I God, how clearly and honestly I would see all of that--and so much more! I am incapable of the honesty that permits me to see how weak and flawed that I am. I, as all humanity, am addicted to denial. And were I God, I would see me for what I always have been.

God sees, knows, and understands all about me--in full detail! God knows that when I am the best me that I can become, little of that will change. Yet, He still loves and forgives me when I have the honesty, humility, and courage to repent.

I am glad that He is God.

David Chadwell

West-Ark Church of Christ, Fort Smith, AR
Bulletin Article, 3 May 1998

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